One of the most challenging responsibilities for a disciple of Christ is to find a church to attend. Because we are living in a day of apostasy (falling away), often times the church is not a safe place for a committed Christian. I would like to discuss some thoughts with you about how to go about looking for a fellowship of believers.
First, you want to be realistic. This is going to be a difficult task. There are few places left that are going to be beneficial for a committed believer to want to join. The second thought has to do with perspective. Go with the attitude and idea that you want to be a contributor to the fellowship. If you go with the idea of what can this group of Christians do for me, you most likely will be disappointed. Be a giver first. As you are looking, think how could I fit into this body of believers and benefit the cause of Christ not only here but beyond the walls of this fellowship.
Let’s talk about some things you do not need to be focused on when looking for a fellowship. Do not be concerned about the meeting place. Do not focus on the credentials of the leaders, but rather on their character. Do not place convenience at the top of your list. You may have to commute quite a distance. And lastly, do not think long term. Prepare to go with the attitude that this is where the Lord wants you to attend for now. Do not think you have to make a long term commitment to be a part.
Now, things to look for in the order of importance. First, look for true Christians that you can connect with in your spirit. I know this sounds a little strange considering that this is Church and the people here are supposed to be Christians. But in reality, people go to a fellowship for all kinds of different reasons and many times those reasons are not that good. So when you go, look for people that you can have a kindred spirit with and that you can talk with about your life in Christ and feel like they can connect with where you are. If this is not there, you will not last long. The reality is – this is one of the deepest needs that Christians have when they meet together – to connect spiritually with those with whom they worship.
After this you want to have a short list of scriptural beliefs that are important to you. First, it goes without saying that they need to have a clear understanding of salvation along with the other basic doctrines of scripture, i.e. inerrancy of the Word, the virgin birth, the priesthood of the believer, the return of Christ, etc. But then what are you looking for beyond these basic scriptural beliefs?
You could make a long list of all the points of scripture that are important to you as it relates to family, Christian lifestyle, church structure, and separation from the world. You could go on and on here no doubt. But let me give you a list of five areas you can focus on and if these five are in place along with the basic doctrines previously listed, you can believe this would be a good place for you to join with and grow in Christ.
First, ask the question, “Do they honor life?” And you can answer this question just by looking around at some practical things you will see while attending. Do the families have several children or do they just have two or three. Does the church rejoice when a family shares they are expecting another child. What is the church’s stand on using birth control. This is as an important point as any on this list. Because God loves people and we need to love people like God loves people. If they do not see the importance of this point, move on. Also, do they respect the elderly people among them, especially those members who maybe cannot lead or even participate like they once could. Do the families put their elderly members in homes or do they look for ways to care for them in their own families.
Second point. Do the members honor commitment? Christianity is all about commitment. Jesus taught others they needed to be his disciples, not just followers. And Jesus was committed to His Father’s will and true believers must honor commitments they have made. How do you determine if this group of believers honor commitment. Check out their view on divorce and remarriage. If they condone remarriage after divorce, they have lowered the bar of commitment. If that is the case, do not expect they will honor their commitments in times of suffering. And folks, hard times are here for Christians and it does not appear that the road is going to get any better. You need to be in fellowship with believers that honor commitment in their life.
Third area to evaluate. Do they honor priorities? The Christian walk is about making choices. And those choices are not always easy ones to make. A growing Christian will begin to see the need to make choices based on the right priorities. How can you judge this in a fellowship? Look at their view of money. Do the members borrow money and are they in debt? If so, their priorities are not in the right place. They are more concerned about the treasures of earth than they are the treasures of heaven. Jesus made this clear in His teaching. Matthew 6:19-21 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: 20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: 21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. If they borrow money, their heart will be in their earthly treasures.
Fourth area that you need to think about. Do they honor each other? And here the answer will come as quickly as you enter into their meeting. Just look around and see if they have a standard of modesty. If they do, they are respecting one another. Paul wrote to the Philippian Christians. 2:3-4 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. 4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. If they do not have a standard of modesty, they are about drawing attention to themselves for their selfish need. Modesty sends a message that a person’s goal is to respect others around them and not to be a stumbling block with immodest dress. Immodesty in a church fellowship is a sure sign of selfishness.
Last area to address in your search. Look to see if they desire godliness. The Apostles Paul and Peter both stressed the importance of godliness in the church. This is a truth that is being put aside in churches today. Paul said exercise thyself rather unto godliness (1 Timothy 4:7), godliness is profitable unto all things (1 Timothy 4:8), godliness with contentment is great gain (1 Timothy 6:6). Peter said what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness. (2 Peter 3:11). How do you discern if they have an understanding of godliness? Listen to the music they sing. If the music has a rock beat, back beat, is written by ungodly people, or produces wrong thoughts in your mind, then flee that church. It is no place for a disciple of Christ to be if they want to live a godly life. Wrong music stirs up the flesh which is the opposite of godliness. Do not be deceived by this modern thinking about music.
In conclusion, there are many challenges in looking for a place to worship with a group of believers so that you can be fulfilling the scriptures that teach us about being in the body of Christ. But these thoughts are a good start in helping you along the way.
